Unless you’ve been living under a rock lately, you’ve heard the smash pop hit, “Rude” by the group Magic!. It speaks about a young man, seeking permission to marry a traditional man’s daughter.
He is turned down by the young lady’s father, but rather than being rebuffed, he retorts with the line, “I’m gonna marry her anyway!”
This is obviously a disturbing thought for any man who has spent a couple of decades nurturing what he considers to be one of his most valuable relationships on the planet. How might a father respond to such a scenario?
So what is the proper role of a father in such a situation with his daughter? Here is one father’s response:
Here is the full video:
I think the popularity of Magic’s hit, “Rude” emphasizes the shift that has occurred culturally in America over the past 60 years, where fathers are no longer considered to be important entities in family life. They are regularly portrayed on television and movies as weak, bumbling idiots, who are constantly rescued from their folly by their wives and children.
There has always been a tension that has existed between fathers and prospective young men hoping to whisk away their daughters. I believe it was G.K. Chesterton who said that fathers in every generation feel that they taking a priceless vase and handing it to an ape when they give their daughters in marriage. There certainly are scenarios of over-bearing fathers who act in a domineering and abuse manner, but sometimes proper protection can be seen as over-protection.
In Biblical times, it was expected that fathers (of the bride and the groom) both played an important role in the marriage process of their adult children.
What should that role be today? What does the Scripture say? What do you think?
Israel Wayne is an Author and Conference Speaker and the Director of Family Renewal, LLC. He is also the Site Editor for www.ChristianWorldview.net.
I’ll tell you what is worse than a father being seen as overprotective, and that is father whose daughter learns that she’s not worth anything because he didn’t want to be “rude” and refuse to let her go out (let alone marry!) with the guy who is clearly the kind of man a loving father wouldn’t let his daughter be alone with for any length of time. Dads, forget what the culture says. Forget what your foolish teen daughter says. Do what a dad ought to do. Your daughter might fuss, but at least she’ll know you love her. (I mean, unless you do it WRONG. I’m sure there is a wrong way to do that. 😉 )
Good grief. What a poorly edited comment. I think I will stop commenting on blogs now. Is 6 p.m. too late for a nap?
I guess I must be living under a rock because I hadn’t heard this song before. I sure enjoyed watching the spoof however. It is more entertaining then the original song. Like most things in life, this is a balance. The father can help guide, search, and evaluate young men. He can also be an example of a Biblical man to his daughter. But ultimately, considering the culture we live in today, he must reach his daughter’s heart for she’s sees the lead singer of “Magic” as silly as he does when she is evaluating her options.
Still trying to get past that second paragraph. Whew, never heard of this, but to quote my 17 yr old daughter (daughter number 4 of 5) “yeah dad looks scary and used to be a body builder, but it is Mom you need to worry about”
🙂